Cord Cutting

How cutting energetic cords is the missing piece to ending a relationship with more ease.

Drawn into his web again, I wonder, what am I doing here?

I know that this relationship is not good for me.  I know that this is going nowhere, yet I feel almost compelled to be in his field again. What we have is powerful.  Tearing it apart is so painful.

We fight.  I cry.  I leave.  I come back.  Why?

Why do we choose to be in a dis-functional relationship for far too long?  Why would we hold onto a relationship when we know we need to end it?

This has happened before, but we haven’t learned the lesson yet.  Maybe we have just forgotten how entangling relationships are and that we have intermingled our energy cords.

We are energy.  The energetic tendrils of our systems intertwine like vines through our bodies, our hearts and even our spirits.

It is as though we are sharing cells with each other. Therefore, we are much more interconnected than we would like to think.

When we love someone deeply or have a long term relationship with someone (even if love is not the reason we are connected), we are as energetically invested in them as they are in us.

You can feel this when you break off a relationship.  The connection is so strong; the pattern of being with that person so familiar, that it often feels as though there is a hole in your heart or a part of your body is missing.

Even though you know that the relationship is not working, you are in a lot of pain: emotional, physical, spiritual.

We often try to reconnect through sex or late night phone calls, but this only delays the  inevitable acceptance that it’s time to “cut the cord.”

They say that time is the best medicine for healing all wounds but there are energy practices that can be done to help assist the process.

Psychics and seers often report the ability to see cords embedded in people’s bodies.  Sometimes these cords appear to be draining energy.  So cutting cords is an important self-care practice in general and especially important while transitioning out of an entangled, poorly functioning relationship.

There are many ways to assist in cutting these cords. I am offering suggestions, but this is your unique practice. I encourage you to experiment and see what feels right for you.

To begin: call for spiritual help, your most supportive energies.  .

This might be God, Goddess, Jesus, angels, a saint, a spirit guide, Gaia or simply the light of the Universe.

“I call on my guides, angels and Archangels to assist me in cutting the cords that are no longer serving me.  I ask that those that serve my highest and best help me to be whole and clear.”

Close your eyes.  Spend some time feeling your breath enter and exit your body and let your mind calm.

Vision your body in your mind’s eye.  Scan your body to see if you can tune into any places that feel like a cord or rope is connected to the physical or energy bodies.  The auric field is a multi-layered bubble encompassing the body and it is affected by these energetic cords.  You might experience areas of darkness, or just a place that calls your attention.

Don’t worry if this doesn’t happen for you.  It isn’t important to see things.  Even if you have no internal experience of this it is still working.  Noticing subtle energies is a skill developed over time.

Use your imagination.  This is the beginning of the path.  The imagination is actually far more connected to reality than you might think.

“I cut the cords attached to (name of the person you are cutting from).  I release and let go of this attachment with love.”

“I allow any energies from this person to be released back to their higher self.”

This allows their higher self to do the work instead of the actual person who is probably in pain as well.  This is especially important when dealing with abusive or obsessive relationships.

You can do this same work with any person, place or thing such as a city you feel was toxic for you, a bar that you no longer want to spend your Friday nights at or the evil of the day, sugar.

As you visualize the cord severing, you can bring your hands up, fingers together and slowly run them all around your body.  It is as if your hands were knives cutting all cords from you.

As you visualize the cords leaving you, send love and compassion to that person from your heart and your higher self.

Even if you are cutting cords from someone that you are angry with or do not like, even if that person has abused or damaged you, realize that love is abundant and free and it is better to do spiritual energetic work with as much love, forgiveness and compassion as possible.  It is as much for you as for them.  If you aren’t there yet, let yourself at least feel compassion and love for yourself.

Don’t worry that you might cut cords with people you want to be connected with and damage the relationship.  The help you are asking for is much wiser than that.

If you are in process of ending a relationship, you are probably in pain.  At this point add in whatever prayers, intentions or requests that you have.

“May my heart be healed”. “May I learn the lessons from this relationship with grace and ease”.  “May I receive the healing that I need in this moment”.

You can place your hands on your heart or your body and imagine light pouring from your hands into your body.

You can use your hands again to move around your body to patch up your auric field and make it whole and strong.  Use your imagination.

If you find a place where you sensed the release of the cord, spend some extra time in this area visualizing light filling this space of your body and the auric field.  You can imagine yourself in a bubble of light and fill that bubble with a healing color such as pink or gold.

This is actually quite important!  Not doing this can leave you feeling worse, as you are emptying something and you must refill it with something else.  Nature abhors a vacuum and you must always refill with light and love when you release something from your body or field.

At the end, thank your helper spirits or energies.

“Thank you for your assistance.  I release you.”

This brings closure to the space.

You can do this practice daily until you start to feel lighter and less attached and then repeat it as you feel the need.

This can be done as part of a morning practice, in bed at night before you go to sleep or at any time of the day.

If you don’t have much time to do all of this a quick, “I cut all cords and energetic attachments that are not serving my highest and best” works wonders.

Ceremonial cord cutting with your ex.

It is possible to do this same work with your ex.

This can be more of a ceremonial work.  Some people even invite friends to witness the ceremony especially in cases of a long term relationships or marriage.

You might want to bring a symbol of your relationship to the ceremony that you can burn or bury.  This could be something you got on a trip together, letters or whatever feels right for you.

Allow yourselves some time and space.  Sit across from each other.  Look into each other’s eyes.  Allow yourself to speak or read something to your ex that really comes from your heart.

Acknowledge them, the love you have shared and your hopes for them in the future.

Be real and present and let your heart do the talking.

Encourage each other to cry. These are tears of grief and the passing of something important, instead of blame.  

“I let you go and release the cords that we have created.  I wish you love and all the best for your life.  I am grateful for all that we have experienced together.”  

This is an honoring and a severing.

In this, there is a creation of space.  The finalization becomes more clear and there is a sense of relief and closure.

Letting go of someone that we love is not easy.  Too often we stay in relationships when we know they are no longer serving our evolution and growth.  It is a brave thing to pull away from a loved one as both are likely to feel pain which can be quite intense.

In pulling away, we must acknowledge the energetic as well as the emotional, spiritual,  and physical realities of this contract that was created between two people.

I hope that these practices are of service to your journey to find a wholeness of heart again and to allow the space for love to reenter your life when it is time.